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#33: Choices Made is Confidence Earned

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Image by Sacks08

Conversations you have with yourself….

“What outfit am I going to wear today?  Will I stop and get a coffee on my way to work?  With lunch will I get fries or substitute the salad?  Who will I call to have dinner with tomorrow?  When will I fit in my workout today?”

What are the answers to these questions?  Choices.

We make hundreds of them, if not more, every day.  The funny part is sometimes they seem so small that we do not realize we made one.  Brushing your teeth is one you make every day, if not multiple times, and those around you are happy you did.  Showering, eating food for breakfast, and getting to work on time, all are choices you make regularly. Probably some of us did not even realize that we have another option.

We always do.  Within life choices lives power, confidence, and intentional living.

“Okay Joey, so I brush my teeth, eat food, and choose to shower daily.  What about when serious decisions must be made?  How does one handle them and come out okay on the other side?”  The interesting part is no matter how big or small the choice is, you can apply the following principles to be confident in your decision:

  1. What are the different actions I can choose to take, and what is the outcome of each one?

  2. Which outcomes could I live with?

  3. How would these outcomes affect my life?

  4. What outcomes am I willing to stand behind and live with?

#4 is the where the sweet spot lies.  Here is where your confidence grows.

Sometimes our decisions carry great weight on our future and with them can come attention from others in our lives.  People might ask you to explain why made this choice or that.  Others might try to tell you your choice was wrong.  In these moments others are testing you, and in a way, seeing if you stand behind your choices.

Nobody questions you on you brushing your teeth, besides maybe the dentist at your next cleaning or if you are a little child.  If you decide to stop dating a guy, go to college, switch careers, or start eating healthy though, lots of questions come your way. If you have thought through these principles ahead of time you will be prepared to give an answer, and a sliver of confidence is stacked on top of your foundation.  It helps solidify why you made the decision you chose.

Sometimes people ask these questions to try to make you change your mind.  Don’t play their stupid game.

The purpose of taking time to answer the four questions above when making a choice is to help you feel confident in your decision and reasoning behind it.  This gives you opportunity to think it through.  Through this process you stand up for yourself and decide what your choice will be.  You grow your confidence because in these moments you are thinking about what is best for you in your life while not focusing on how others will react to your decisions.

Focusing on the “what ifs” of how others react is a waste of time and constrictive to your confidence.

People who love and care about you will understand your decisions.  Giving fuel and energy to other’s opinions only takes it away from growing yourself.  It is wasteful, unproductive, and not what women of TCW are about.  We strive to grow, improve, and move forward in our lives.  We do not have time to waste on those who only want to get in our way.

By you reading this far I know you are a woman of TCW and strive to live this type of life.  Start by breaking down your choices, standing behind your decisions, and analyze how these tasks grow your confidence.  I promise you it earns you more confidence than wasting time wondering how others would want to do.  Join the movement, live the life you truly want, be part of TCW.  The choice is all yours.  🙂  

Question:  How will using these four steps to make decisions will make your choices easier to make a decision, live with, and deal with judgmental people in your life?  

Within our daily life, each of us live through experiences that bring us to a point that we must make a decision and choose how to move forward.  Sometimes it is easy, and other time what you are up against seems like too much to handle.

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  • Shelley

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About Me

Hello, I am Joey Phillippi, a Licensed Master Social Worker.  My mission is to help you live a confident life, gain a greater understanding of yourself and others, and identify ways we can join together to positively change our world.

I have conducted many confidence interviews with women to gather additional insight to understand how to create a generation of confident women.  I write, speak, and coach on the subject of confidence to help women improve their lives and achieve their dreams and goals.

I am dating a wonderful man, enjoy traveling, riding motorcycles, exercise, living a healthy life, and look forward to becoming a mother in the future.

Read more about me